Top 10 Relationship Do’s and Don’ts
a comprehensive list for Men and Women
Being in a relationship can be the best feeling in the world. I think we all can agree that relationships can feel like a roller coaster with its highs and lows. Working with a number of couples I’ve seen a trend over the years, and these trends apply to both men and women. Meaning that the are some quirks and habits that both men and women engage in, while others seem to be more gender specific by in large.
When you’re in the early stages of the relationship we tend to see more of the positives while dismissing most if not all of the negatives. I’m sure that you have heard the phrase, It’s not the big things that matter, but all the little things that will cause the problem over time.
With this in mind I’ve compiled a list of do’s and don'ts for both men and women.
Top 10 Relationship Do’s and Don’ts for Men
DO:
- Just listen. When your partner is sharing, offer your full attention—she’s not always looking for advice, just to be heard.
- Trust and respect her. These are the foundations of any lasting relationship.
- Treat her as an equal. Value her opinions, thoughts, and contributions.
- Stay emotionally present. When she’s upset, your support matters more than your solutions.
- Keep dating her. Continue to woo her even after she’s committed to you—romance should never stop.
- Show love through small gestures. A spontaneous “I love you” call or her favorite snack can mean as much as grand gifts.
- Keep your promises. Follow through on agreements—it builds trust.
- Support her dreams. Encourage her ambitions and celebrate her achievements.
- Join her world. Discover what she enjoys and experience it with her.
- Apologize sincerely. Say “I’m sorry” when you hurt her, whether it was intentional or not.
DON’T:
- Go to bed angry. Resolve conflicts or at least agree to revisit them calmly the next day.
- Jump into fixing mode. Sometimes she just wants to vent—let her.
- Fake attention. She’ll know when you’re only half-listening.
- Shut her out. If you need space, communicate it with kindness and reassurance.
- Criticize her appearance. It’s damaging and often unnecessary.
- Speak down to her. You’re her partner, not her parent.
- Take her words literally when emotions are high. Phrases like “You never listen!” usually mean “I don’t feel heard right now.”
- Let jealousy poison the relationship. Trust is essential.
- Invade her privacy. Respect her boundaries.
- Forget special dates. Birthdays and anniversaries matter—mark them.
Top 10 Relationship Do’s and Don’ts for Women
DO:
- Make your time together count. Even if it’s limited, keep it positive and meaningful.
- Trust and respect him. He needs to feel valued just as much as you do.
- Stop the nagging. Repetition often breeds resentment rather than results.
- Give him space. Allow him time to recharge without interrogation.
- Acknowledge the small things. Let him know you notice and appreciate his efforts.
- Initiate intimacy. Be open, spontaneous, and creative in your physical relationship.
- Honor your commitments. Keep your word—it’s how trust grows.
- Support his goals. Stand beside him as he pursues his passions.
- Be clear about your needs. He can’t read your mind—communicate directly.
- Accept his "no" without resentment. Trust that if he could say yes, he would.
DON’T:
- Go to bed angry. It creates emotional distance and unresolved tension.
- Force him to share emotions constantly. He may process feelings differently than you.
- Interrupt his favorite show or game. Timing matters—wait until he can give you full attention.
- Keep giving when you feel unappreciated. Address imbalance before resentment takes root.
- Criticize what he does. Encouragement inspires change more than complaints.
- Talk down to him. Treat him as a partner, not a child.
- Use sex as a reward or punishment. This turns intimacy into a tool for control.
- Compare him to fictional characters. Unrealistic comparisons only breed dissatisfaction.
- Invade his privacy. Trust goes both ways.
- Try to change him. Love him for who he is today, not who you think he could become.
Closing Thoughts
There’s a lot about love and relationships that most of us were never taught. Communication styles, emotional needs, and expectations often differ between men and women—but learning to understand and respect those differences is key to creating lasting connections. Don’t let your relationship become another divorce statistic. Whether you’re just starting out or have been together for years, these principles can help you nurture a healthier, more fulfilling bond.
Want to take your relationship skills even deeper?
Click the link below to watch a short video where we break down the common relationship ending mistakes—and share practical tools you can start using today.
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